Attract females and growl threateningly to ward off rivals.

Researchers suggested that homosexuality in men may be an evolutionary advantage if it is caused by a set of “feminizing” genes and if men who carry sub-critical numbers of these genes are rendered more sensitive and therefore less likely to kill their own offspring. Gays and lesbians were found to have the most masculine and feminine voices among men and women, respectively, and people with sexy voices were found to have more symmetrical, attractive features. Biologists dated the emergence of vocal sounds to 400 million years ago by studying the gruntings of male toadfish and midshipmanfish, both of which hum deeply to attract females and growl threateningly to ward off rivals. Scientists discovered a sexually deceptive orchid so convincing that male wasps will mate with it to the point of ejaculation. Because unfertilized female wasps can produce sons but not daughters, the orchids on which the wasps waste their sperm will eventually create a larger population of male wasps to pollinate them. It was determined that male bees prefer sex with Ophrys orchids to sex with female bees, that straight men with attractive partners have more sex not because the partners are attractive but to discourage infidelity, and that men who are deceitful, narcissistic thrill-seekers also have more sex.

An Australian zoologist revealed that applying estrogen to the penis induces the skin’s proteins to thicken, thereby creating a barrier against HIV infection, and 90 percent of Africans were found to carry a gene variation that evolved to protect them from malaria but that increases their chances of being infected with HIV; the gene also prolongs their life expectancy if they contract the virus. Scientists discovered that watermelon rinds possess a Viagra-like chemical and were hoping to breed a race of aphrodisiac super-melons wherein the flesh, too, will possess the chemical. Brazilian researchers may have created human sperm cells by injecting pulp from the teeth of human babies into the testicles of mice, and sensory analysts created the perfect cheese sandwich. Computers are now better than people at air hockey.

The passages above are from the “Findings” section of in the September 2008 issue of Harper’s and were written by Rafil Kroll-Zaidi. The pictures are from one of my favorite new sites, Something Intellectual.

And for more Harper’s goodness, I highly recommend to you one of my favorite articles from the magazine, about magical penis thieves.

2 responses to “Attract females and growl threateningly to ward off rivals.

  1. There’s this radio commercial for some sexual performance enhancer which they play repeatedly on my station. According to the commercial, you need to eat 12 watermelons to get that viagra-like response.

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